Don’t ban helium ballons. Just don’t buy them.

Wrong tide, wrong wind but I wanted some mackerel for my smoker so I’m whipping a little silver dude into the wind and a helium ballon floats by. There is a swirl behind it so I cast behind it and sure enough a small striped bass too dumb to know better is trying to eat the streamer. I reel her in and put her back in the water and chased down the balloon that went up on the rocks a hundred yards downwind.

So this is my public service announcement. We don’t have to ban these things, just don’t buy them.

Don’t be a bad dad. If you want to be bad, pop these things in the checkout line at Market Basket. I will bail you out. Promise.

If you impulse buy one in the Market Basket checkout because you forgot your daughter’s birthday, stop. You are a bad dad. Don’t make it worse. Buy a box of oreos instead.

Last year’s haul. They last forever. Every tiny bit looks like food to a fish.

5 thoughts on “Don’t ban helium ballons. Just don’t buy them.

  1. That’s like saying don’t make seatbelts mandatory; “all the good parents & smart people will use them”. Until seatbelts were mandatory, there were 15,000 more lives lost each year according to NHTSA.
    Humans will never give up bright shiny objects until they are simply not available. Let’s give the wild animals and the planet a break. I should think parents would welcome the chance to go shopping without children being pulled toward every trap retailers set out for them.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You have a point. I would hope that Market Basket and others who sell these balloons would realize with enough comments made about them that selling them is bad for business.

      If I went to Market Basket and saw that they replaced the balloons with a sign saying why they are a terrible idea I would by extra boxes of Oreos. I think I will go to their facebook page and leave a link to my article.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Good idea, but why not suggest they put fruit or something healthy up there instead of sugar-laden oreos? Everything is the bottom line in business. Don’t some markets have candy free checkouts? How did that happen?

        Like

        1. I do remember a checkout line about a decade ago that was candy free. I think it lasted a month. Stores are in the business of moving product. The high markup crap is always going to be at the caps of the aisles and surrounding the checkout.

          It’s almost like you are asking that Fireball nips not be sold a tthe register at the packie! Not going to happen.

          I always left my kids locked in the car with the windows rolled up and a bowl of water. :-O

          Like

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