Good Morning Gloucester

The 2014 Hater’s Guide To The Williams-Sonoma Catalog

From Deadspin and forwarded by Robin Jones (click the link above to check the whole thing out)

It starts-

It’s a difficult world out there, people. War, poverty, brutality, corruption, social and racial injustice … these are not civil times we live in. Which is why, more than ever, we NEED the comfort and warmth that only life inside the Williams-Sonoma catalog can provide. Follow me, America. Follow me inside these glossy pages, where there is no anger. No violence. No internet commenters explaining why YOUR SO STOOPID.

In here, there is nothing but endless kitchen countertops, and meticulously arranged buffet spreads with pre-made bundt cakes (prep it a day early, and your party is a snap!) that have been drizzled just so with triple-butterscotch icing. There are fancy chocolates enrobed in other fancy chocolates. There are WHIMSICAL TINS (yes, the copy actually says that). There are thousands of newfangled cooking tools and gadgets and devices that only a Greenwich, Conn., kitchen could possibly have space to accommodate. There are dustings and sprinklings and twee little bows, all perfectly arranged for your perfect little evening of perfect holiday entertaining with your perfect neighbor guests and your perfect children standing by the table in their john-johns and singing gaily to you all as you pipe fresh, warm cognac into each other’s butts.

Really, click the link to see the whole post on Deadspin, it’s good stuff. Just in case you’re not sure where to click- see the highlighted text after the word “word”, click there. word The 2014 Hater’s Guide To The Williams-Sonoma Catalog

Item #66-4052924 – Lobster Mac And Cheese ($99)