A Magnolia Icon Has Passed

Lisa Ramos writes-

Dear Joey, A Magnolia icon has passed.  My grandmother, Fran Hines, founder of the Magnolia Historical Society, and the Magnolia Library Center, original member of the Magnolia Women’s Club dedicated her life to preserving the history of Magnolia. She was the inspiration, driving force and educator in helping me write the book, Magnolia- A Brief History. She was well loved by all of our community she volunteered at every fundraiser for over 60 years.  I have been asked to ask you to publish her eulogy for all to see.  Good Morning Gloucester has been an unbelievable advertisement for Magnolia Historical Society fundraisers and we appreciate all you have done for us.  Although my Gram wasn’t quite "online", she understood the importance of outreaching to the community.

Thank you,

Lisa Ramos

granddaughter of Fran Hines

President of the Magnolia Historical Society

On behalf of my family I welcome you all to this service. We have come together today to celebrate the life of Fran “don’t call me Frances, but you can call me Gram” Hines. May god bless and keep her and may god bless each and every one of you, for your part in her life.

She has been preparing for her journey for quite some time now. She spent the last years of her life planning the affairs of her death and thinking through exactly what she wanted to happen.

I never met anyone who more clearly understood that death is a part of life or who more carefully crafted a rite of passage reflecting that wisdom.

It may come as no surprise to you that she not only wrote her own obituary, but left detailed instructions to each member of her family as to what she expected them to do. Every aspect was carefully crafted from the poems she wanted read, the saying on the back of the funeral card, the pictures she wanted displayed, the objects she wanted to be buried with right down to the color lipstick she wanted to wear.

We were all blessed to be able to have our final conversations with her and she with us. She also prayed to die early enough in the week so that her wake could be held on Friday and her funeral on Saturday. That’s exactly what she would have wanted.

If she were here today, she would stand proud at this podium and tell you stories of Magnolia history and about her special friends. She would talk about her own family, how grateful she was to have her parents, husband, and brothers , all of her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren love her as much as she loved them. She would tell you how proud she was of each one of us.

Her first priority was always family and she instilled that belief in all of us. She spent time with each of her grandchildren, going to storyland, playing games or looking for leprchauns. When she wasn’t with family she was treating others like they were family.

She was well known as gram to all of her own grandchildren and all of their friends and spouses.

She was born and raised in Magnolia and she married her high school sweetheart Paul and together they raised 5 daughters, 10 grandchildren and 13 great grandchildren. They shared their lives happily in Magnolia for over 50 years. After Paul passed away, so did a piece of Fran.

Lets share some special memories together. First, no matter who you were or weather she knew you or not, your name was darling. And it came in all viewpoints. “Nice to meet you Darlin” or if you gave her a gift, “thank you darling”, something sad happened “oh darling”, looking for something “Its on the second shelf darling”, “would you get me a cup of tea darling?’ If you were being unsafe “be careful darling” or the last words my grandmother spoke to me, “I love you too darling”

I’m also really going to miss visiting her, seeing her busily working at the never ending pile of paperwork at her kitchen table or quietly watching her soap opera, all the kids in the neighborhood will miss her when they realize that that lady that gives out jumbo candy bars at Halloween has passed, we will certainly miss her when we go for our annual family weekend in Maine. I’m going to miss her beef stew, gram made the best beef stew. She would call me and say im making beef stew on thrusday do you want to come over for lunch, yeah. Chocolate cream pie, mmmm simple yet delicious, its where I got the nickname the coolwhip kid, Her food was made with love and we loved every bite.

We will all miss the cards. Gram sent everybody a card for every occasion. I mean every occasion, birthday, anniversary, Halloween, Easter, St Pattys day, valentines day, thanksgiving, graduation, and every note hand written. She probably spent a couple hundred dollars a month on cards, but it meant more to us than any amount of money ever could. And everybody celebrated their birthday, whether you liked it or not, if it was your birthday, we were having the party. Gram made sure of that. Don’t like that idea, then you get the look.

That’s another thing I will miss is “the look” . My grandmother never yelled, you got “the look” One was most likely to get the look if you were doing something that gram did not approve of. If you were a teenager, you got the look when you tried to make an excuse to not go to some summer Sunday afternoon baby shower, my dad and I once got the look for laughing out loud in church. But if Fran never gave you the look, have no fear. My Aunt Sam has inherited “the look”.

My Gram saved everything! Every memory of every family event big or small was protected with love. In her preperations, she began to organize, label and file her stockpile of memories for her family. For each one from the day they were born, she saved every piece of personal history. Years of pictures of birthday parties, programs from every play,every piano recital, dance recital, every picture drawn for my grandparents, first communion and confirmation, award, every newspaper article your name ever appeared in, every business card, advertisement, ,prom pictures, high school and college graduation booklets, bridal and baby shower announcement, wedding invitation and announcements, and even matches from the table.

My Gram was the best secret keeper. When she said she would take it to the grave, she did. She was warm hugs and sweet memories, she hoped and prayed that all your dreams come true, she loved you no matter what. She could see past temper tantrums and bad moods and made it clear they don’t affect how precious you are. An encouraging word, a bit of time, a cup of tea, she remembers the child you were and cherishes the person you have become. She was a walking piece of history. I am sure everyone in this church has a story to tell about her, one that would make you laugh, or make you cry, a story that would make you roll your eyes at her audacity and brilliance or what you learned by just listening.

She taught me the history of our family and the village of Magnolia, and I taught her the how use products of the future and dance without abandon.

Gram hand wrote every address for the MHS newsletters for 25 years, I taught her how to create an excel spreadsheet. She had never been on a plane, I took her on a mothers day trip to Disney World. She took me back in time to when the Lexington Avenue was lined with New York shops and the oceanside was thriving.

I could get gram to do things she wouldn’t normally do and I learned to respect her by trying to restrain from activities she would not approve of.

One of my favorite pictures of my gram is when we were in Florida, I got her to sit on a Harley Davidson. I would say things to her to get her going all the time. Hey gram why don’t you come skiing with us, Ill set you up with some sticks and you can come to the top and do moguls all the way in your new hot pink ski suit. She would respond, oh ho darling. We had a lot of fun together

I could go on for days about the many fond memories I have. She was a fairy tale grandmother and as I got older I grew to realize, the woman I once saw as old fashioned was just the opposite. She had a lifetime of experience with men, relationships, child rearing, friends, family and work. She lived a wonderful life and everyone that met her loved her. Today when I close my eyes, I see her clapping her hands and cheering us all in everything we did. When Sean and Nathan caught a huge bullfrog together and brought it to show gram, she did not cover in disgust, she raised her hands high and said, wow that’s a great big frog you boys caught.

Fran truly believed, Love is living in Magnolia. She dedicated her life to preserving the history, the beauty, and the sense of family that is the collective heartbeat of this community.

She worked at the St Josephs church fairs, she was an original member of the Magnolia Womens club, charter member of Magnolia Neighborhood Association, she served on the first board of the Magnolia Library Center and volunteered her services steadily over 60 years. She received numerous awards for her dedication to her beloved Magnolia. She would be proud to know the flag that waves over Magnolia is a half staff with a black ribbon in her memory.

In 1982, Fran established the Magnolia Historical Society to collect and preserve the grand history of Magnolia. All the memorabilia she had saved over the years coupled with others in the same habit, allowed them to establish the historical museum. As she grew in years, she documented all she saw, she lived it, just like the rest of us are doing now, she swam at the beach, she rode her bike to the store, she hung around the square, she went to the library. The things she has seen, the Oceanside burn to the ground, steamboats become extinct, roads built to accommodate the ever growing popularity of the automobile , she saw the tea gardens, she went to Blynman school, West Pond is named after her family, she shoveled dirt at the opening of Magnolia woods, she has volunteered at every Magnolia fundraiser and she has baked for every event at the magnolia library for more than 60 years. She voluntarily worked for the MHS since she founded it. Gram never rested, she never stopped, she was momentum on wheels, focused, relentless, she got the job done.

While we were writing the book, she and Jimmy Cook and I would have weekly dinner table meetings at grams house. Jimmy and I thought that was a great idea, because we knew she would surely make a banana bread. Together we developed what is now the book Magnolia – A Brief History. The book is dedicated to my grandmother, and why wouldn’t it be, she was the inspiration, the driving force, the educator. It is now, I realize she was all of those in the story of all of our lives as well.

She mailed her last historical newsletter at the beginning of this month along with the annual appeal letters, and on the day she died Fran raised $250. for the Magnolia Historical Society. Her dedication to the Magnolia Community goes unsurpassed.

In her honor I am asking each of you to help preserve today as tomorrow it will be history. Make some beef stew, a cup of tea and write your own familys history and send it in to the MHS. 100 years from now, your ancestors will learn of yesteryear, just as Fran has shown us through her collection of memories. Think about what you could do to do your part in keeping our village Magnolia beautiful. It’s exactly what she would have wanted.

I am honored that Gram asked me to do her eulogy. My Gram and I had a very close relationship and I am struggling to understand how I will live my life without her in it. Not sure how to go on, in my final conversation with my grandmother I told her, I loved her & I would miss her terribly. In her final hours she continued to comfort me, don’t worry darling, Ill be watching over you.

I started writing this homage while I held my grandmothers hand through the night before she passed. I wept as she was sleeping, because I knew this would be my last opportunity to hold my grammys hand.

When the time finally came to say goodbye, I thought, I have dreaded this moment for many years. I am saying goodbye, looking into her eyes and giving her as strong of a hug as I can without hurting her frail body. She was at peace with herself, her life and her future.

Securing her legend, She leaves this world, with dignity, respect and love, a true Magnolia icon. Its exactly what she would have wanted,

We are grateful to Fran Hines for her examples on how to live and how to die, Fran passed peacefully surrounded by her family just in time to have her wake on Friday and her funeral on Saturday. Its exactly what she would have wanted.

Now that she gone, I know that she will indeed keep her promise to watch over all of us, I hope she gets to greet her past friends and family and I hope she does get to spend eternity in the house of the Lord with her beloved Paul.

I’m going to believe she heard him calling for her, Woman, its time.

And as she ascended into heaven, for a moment ,she turned back to see her family and friends and over an aerial view of the village of Magnolia, she sprinkled bits of her soul, and she whispered an Irish blessing,

May the road rise to meet you

May the wind be always at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon your face and the rains fall soft upon your fields

And until we meet again, may the good lord hold you in the palm of his hand.