Tag: Nike

You may need to read yesterday’s pleas to Nike here to understand what is to follow-

Attention Nike: Make Me Up Some Dri-Fit Boxer Briefs Stat

Posted on July 18, 2012 by Joey C

Some of you kind readers are sending in links to what I would call compression shorts which are made out of a similar material to Nike Dri-Fit material but I should probably explain why this is no where near what I’m talking about.

Sent in by Rob-

I’m trying to let my boys hang free.  I’m not looking to mash my junk all up inside my body cavity like those spandex wearing cyclists who are looking for a .00000001 percent time savings in their bike next race.

There was a spirited conversation on twitter on the subject yesterday.

When asked how many pairs you would commit to buying here are the responses-

John McElhenny-

Patrick Ryan Puts A Name To Them “Bizalls”-

Ryan Pinkham wants to know what kind of squares still wear underwear to begin with

McElhenny’s imagination gets the best of him-

Patrick Ryan with the obligatory Cyclist reference-

Steve Saleeba piles on-

Now this is just plain rediculous-

McElhenny calls for a biker cap to top it off right-

Kenny MacCarthy concurs-

I’m looking for comfort and I don’t want my nuts on a hot sweaty day stuck to my leg.  As I’ve gotten older let’s just say that the boys don’t hang as high and tight as they used to.  So I’d like a little room for them to hang out and not be all smashed up in my shorts, know what I mean?

I also don’t want pink, purple, navy blue lime green, polka dotted or any combination of the sort.  I want white.  The way underwear is supposed to be.

Also sent in by Rob C-

Who in the world needs that kind of gap underneath their ball bag?  I don’t need  a shelf, I just need the classic boxers.  I’m thinking those grey ones are made for eunuchs.

So Nike, if you’re listening just think of a classic style boxer short but made out of your awesome Dri-Fit moisture wicking material.  Not hard to whip up is it?